


Speaking French

by Tortellini



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Bad Decisions, Bad Flirting, Bad French, Bad Jokes, Bad Pick-Up Lines, Bad Puns, Based on a Tumblr Post, Best Friends, Beverly Marsh & Richie Tozier Are Best Friends, Childhood Friends, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Dick Jokes, Dirty Jokes, Epic Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, Inspired By Tumblr, Jokes, M/M, Male Friendship, Male-Female Friendship, Minor Bill Denbrough/Stanley Uris, Minor Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Romantic Friendship, Sexual Humor, Wordcount: 100-500
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-19
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2019-01-19 08:08:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12406449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tortellini/pseuds/Tortellini
Summary: An inside joke between Bill and Stan sort of escalates when Richie and Eddie get involved. Bev is just amused. And maybe a little bit concerned. Just a little though.Oneshot/drabble





	Speaking French

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Speaking French // По-французски](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13184349) by [everytuesday](https://archiveofourown.org/users/everytuesday/pseuds/everytuesday)



"Bill," Stan said seriously. Maybe he was a little bit drunk. What other reasonable explanation could there be? He of all people was arguably the most serious, straight-forward member of their makeshift group of friends. And right now he was grinning--and what's even more, he had his hand on Bill's knee too. Oh. Anyway, Stan took a deep breath, his doe eyes wide. "I want to speak French between your legs."

"Can you even speak French?" Eddie piped up, looking amused. Stan in turn merely nodded. English, Hebrew, and apparently French too? Wow. 

"That's the h-h-hottest thing I-I've ever b-been told." Bill had to grin too. 

"What?" Eddie wrinkled his nose. "How is that hot, Billy? I'm literally just picturing someone screaming 'bonjour' at a penis." To his credit, his cheeks colored a little at the p word, but it hadn't stopped him. 

And then, oh no, Richie on Eddie's other side apparently took that as his signal. He of course had to do one of his Voices. The moment called for it. "SACRE BLEU MADEMOISELLE VAGINA HON HON HON TITTY CROISSANTS!!"

"I hate you so much." Eddie cuffed him on the arm. Lightly though, and by hate he meant love. 

Finally, Bev rolled her eyes at her friends. She loved them all too. Even if they were idiots. "None of you should ever be allowed to have sex."


End file.
